Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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