Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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