Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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