Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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