Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.


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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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