Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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