Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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