Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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