Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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