Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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