Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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