Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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