Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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