Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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