Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!

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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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