Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.

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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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