Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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