Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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