Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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