Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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