Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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