Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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