Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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