Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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