Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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