Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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