Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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