Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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