Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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