Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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