Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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