Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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