Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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