Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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