Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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