Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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