Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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