Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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