Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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