Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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