Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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