Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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A seal walks into a club...
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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