Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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