Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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