Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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