Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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