Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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