Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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