Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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