Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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