Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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