Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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