Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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