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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,
he's a catholic converter.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?
Juan by Juan.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!
If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?
Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.
A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.
I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?
Spelling.
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What type of cars do elves drive?
Toy-otas.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?
Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?
H2O.
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