A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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