How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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